Monday, April 18, 2005

7 weeks and counting...

Hooray! I am 7 weeks today! How cool is that? So far, so good!!
Except I am positively STARVING all the time... well, every two hours at least.
I get queasy if I don't eat something, usually some bread or a cracker... or six pancakes!! So embarassed about that! But only part is my fault. I had my lunch at 2.30 pm and then it was 8.30 pm with nothing to eat all those hours. I was miserable, not because I craved something but because I was feeling like I was going to throw up at any minute.
In a sense I can't wait for this baby to grow up and compress my stomach so I stop eating... though I am pretty sure if I get there, I will whine about it just the same...

On Wednesday at 6w2d, we had a scan. I had a pain that wrapped around my lower back since last Monday that got progressively worse. George grabbed and dragged me to the doctor on Wednesday. The scan was so funny. I was a nervous wreck! This was the scan that would either make us very happy or devastate us. This time we found the baby right away since he had grown! And there it was, a flicker... a heart beating away fast and steady. My baby is alive!!!
The doctor had to push on my belly to get a better reading but I was such a knot that it took me 2 minutes to hear what the doctor was saying which was "relax your belly muscles so I can see the baby".

All was well and we got an appointment for the 28th... The pain btw seems to be my kidney so I need to look into that since I do have some kidney problems since birth.

So I made it to 7 weeks... the only problem is that I can't seem to bond with my little one. I can pray about him, talk about him and I dream about him, but when I am awake I can't seem to talk to him or think about him. Except some minor inconveniences, I feel good... not pregnant!!
I am not sure why I feel like that... a little detached. Am I trying to protect myself? Or will I be more "motherly" when I feel him kick?
So far my only connection with him are the scans... am I abnormal? However I do dream about him every night! He has my (big, cartoonish) eyes!! And cute lips!

I cannot wait for my next sonogram which is Wednesday.
Ok I need a nap. If I don't get enough sleep, I cannot keep my eyes open during the day.
Sweet dreams!

No comments: